i just can’t sleep. so much going on right now. gotta go to a funeral in the morning but i just can’t keep still or find peace. so much of life truly sucks. we can only do so much, but ultimately it all ends one day no matter what. it breeds a really helpless feeling. i’m not sure why anyone has kids and brings more people into this world.
Yo man, when does your band's ep come out??
I have In Memoriam on my ipod lol
It’s currently being mixed and all that jazz. It should be out at some point in July and I can’t wait for people to hear it. We should have it in time for the July 29th show (which is gonna be nuts), hopefully before that. Thanks for listening, I’m really proud that you like that song as it’s definitely the most serious song I’ve ever written and it means alot to see people digging that and not just our song ripping on the neon-pop shit going on.
I can’t believe I always thought I would be there for you. For now I’ll learn and settle for less. Shut my eyes and get some rest. Feel the pulse beneath this sunken chest. And maybe one day I can be there for you.
Wow these guys are actually really good. I thought they would’ve sounded like every other band out there but they don’t. Can’t wait to play with them over the summer
yes. for the duration of that time period, it was the greatest, happiest, most selfless feeling i have ever experienced. in retrospect, there were lots of things that weren’t right with it, mostly stemming from the fact that the person i was with was not a good person and surely not a good person for/to me. however, i hope to feel it again, just obviously with a better/more compatible person.
It seems every damn time that I start writing something positive of, about, or for someone they turn into (and by turn into i mean i finally see them as) a shithead
and before i know it it’s time to add
another portrait to the gallery of extraplatonic footnotes
another carcass to the den of things i wish i never meant then
another shitty poem for another shitty person
and to add injury to insult on some nights i remember the steps i could’ve taken way back when that would make me less alone in bed (and less awful when not so)
"you’re too good for me" "i’m not who you think i am" "i’m not who you need" "that’s a guy i’ll never be"
the truth, and nothing but the convenient and irrefutable truths of self-fulfilling prophecies.
and there was a good one without tendencies toward infidelities without substance abuse without malleable morality without conceit
and thanks to my best efforts without me
i often wonder how far it would’ve gone could it really have been different, really? and i usually try to kill that thought because it brings to mind a big blooming field one to roll around in one to run around
never watching the clock never watching the door never watching the phone
and i’ve written this all to at least have some agency over the fairly blatant and soon enough obvious that i’ve spent so much time just trying to cover my tracks of this corner i’ve painted myself into
How much des could a des mond mond if a des mond could mond des ?
none; he would realize that regardless of how ever much des-mond productivity he could attain, one day it would all dissolve to dust, and he would one day die, with his bowels releasing shortly thereafter, leaving him to end his life on this earth with great filth. or 3.